She's a Lady...

Yep, here she is ladies and gentlemen. Sekhmet's favorite sleeping position, legs wide open...what a polite ladylike way to sleep...

But at least she found a spot of sunlight to lay in. And she has her little bunny friend :)

Melinda Goes to the Doctor

Well I went to the doctor today. We talked and I explained my situation. So he took my height and weight and figured out my BMI (48 for anyone who is curious) and did an EKG and took blood and everything so that could send a remiss to the gastric bypass surgeons in Landskrona. So I guess it is official, I am on my way to a gastric bypass. He also gave me some weight loss medicine that is supposed to help with apetite and depression, to go along with the pills I already take for depression that is.

It was very hard to go there and ask for this, I had to have Jens come with me actually, but I did go and I really like my doctor because he said that sometimes people just can't manage on thier own. He said "Du klarar inte helt enkelt på eget hand, eller hur?". And not in a condescending sarcastic way, but in a it's ok way. Plus the fact that he looks like Dr. McSteamy on Grey's Anatomy of course, all helped to make it easier to go and actually do it.

But I am seeing him in a month or so and he will check my weight and everything again. The waiting time for the surgery is quite long, about a year or so, so it isn't like it will happen now. But Ihaven't made the decision lightly, as the doctor said, it has been on my mind for at least a year now. If not longer. So he respected the fact that this is a last resort for me, that I have tried and secceeded and tried and failed and so on and so forth for so long now that maybe this is something I have to have to keep the weight off. That I can lose it isn't really in question here, it is keeping it away that is the problem. If I have the surgery I HAVE to follow the eating guidelines and so. Now I don't HAVE to.

So we will see how it all goes...

My name is Kitty, Handsome Kitty ;)

I was at Helena's today and got to play with her pretty pretty kitty Mercury :)

Although he is a boy kitty so I am supposed to say he is handsome, not pretty. We don't want him to get a complex after all.

He played with a fun orange hairy ball and let me pet him at least five or six times! Not bad for the second time he has met me :)

Life just doesn't get better than this :)

This was really the best thing I could have ever bought!!! I love laying in my hammock and reading and taking naps and just thinking nad people watching.

If I close my eyes, no one else can see me....

Sekhmet really believes that if she is behind the curtain no one can really see her. Like when we were kids and we played Hide and Seek and there was always that one kid (cough cough, not me of course, cough cough) that just stood there and closed their eyes and really believed that the rest of the kids couldn't see them.

Sekhmet is sooooo cute :)

Spot the Lady Bug!

It is not a very good picture maybe, but there is a lady bug crawling up the flower stem :) He was very cute!

And I will also still try to add cute little photos and fun sections of the blog like before. So it will alternate: bitterness and fun stuff, more bitterness and then more fun stuff :)

Sounds good right?

Melinda at Her Worst

Well this is as unflattering as it gets. The picture is from 2006, and I think the weight is about the same as now. And I can't find a really bad one from the last few weeks. And here you can even see the ice cream! Bad Melinda. Anyway, this is not so easy, setting up my weight and measurements for all the world to see but I guess here goes.

Current Weight: 138,8 (not pounds ladies and gentlemen)

Measurements in Centimeters:

Upper Arm: 49
Shin: 50
Chest: 137
Neck: 37,5
Waist: 131
Knee: 47
Hips: 150
Elbow: 28,5
Thigh: 88

So there we have it. All the nastiness out in the wide open. And all the nastiness will be repeated every month until there is a lot less of it! It was actually embarrassing to measure some places. Like my hips, the measuring tape just made it. And my thigh! That is the number of centimeters, or less!, that a person is supposed to have around their waist!!! Last time Jens leaving me shocked me out of my fat coma where I could not see how bad I had gotten. This time it is the internet dating and how somehow everyone thinks I am just wonderful and sexy and fun and they can't wait to meet me, "Oh, was that your picture? I think I am busy after all...Not ready for meeting anyone just yet...". Need to be normal to meet someone lovely, so now I will do it again I hope.

Weight Loss is a Bitch

Well, a new journey of weight loss begins. Melinda has decided that in order to find the new love of her life she cannot be fat anymore. Whoever said that looks and the outside of a person don't matter as long as you are beautiful inside was full of shit. So here we go, one more time, with feeling!

When I was in the US my friend Kristen and I worked out a rewards chart for me to follow. Every time I went to the gym, for a walk, or washed my dishes etc. I got a little sticker :) Cute yes :) But it really worked!!! Every day I got to put up stickers and get closer and closer to goals but not having the pressure of them in front of me. Here the goal is one sticker at a time. Way less pressure then thinking how many kilos or trips to the gym I need. And after a certain number of stickers I get a reward. Not food!!! For God's sake. But a massage or a new book, you get the idea.

So here you have my new one as well :) It has a few more categories since I have my problem with depression. So things like taking a shower have been added to the list in order to get me back on my feet. And I put all my measurements and weight as of today all around the chart. Now I use stars instead of stickers cause I could not find any good ones. But stars work :) And in the next section I will put up one of my worst fat pictures and my measurements. I have read lately that if you put it all out there on a blog and people read it, you actually have more success. So here it goes, wish me luck!!!